Ordeals of a girl stuck in this society
Is it possible to “unfeel” a little? For instance, to just be unable to picture about the world, the agony, the dearest, the misery. To feel numb, to stop feeling so trapped. Just for a second, can we?
Behind the closed door of my study, I think again. I think for myself and for those who feel wedged too. For those who want to “unfeel.” I look in the opposite direction and grasp phony grins and contentment reflecting off their bodies, drowning themselves into this egocentric biosphere shaped by the leaders. Undoubtedly too naive to realize or too alarmed to leave. We are all so caught to effects, to concepts, procedures or even a mere thought. And even though we feel smothered by it every so often, we do not certainly have an optimal, do we?
I gaze everywhere and see people held to the impression of looking appealing, fearful of not being acknowledged by the society. Who is this society? I ask. Who created this society? Why do we trail something whose identity has been nameless for infinity and why is our lives so tangled to it? I ask again.
My mother says this is how our culture is. An adolescent to be cultivated just so this girl can be wedded to a flush groom and sacrifice herself to him. I ask, is this what our culture is all about? They why educate the girl in the first place? Why make the girl daydream about freedom and in-dependency, when in the end the society is going to take it all away? And when the girl stands up for herself, the society tags her as a rebel. Hypocrisy or Irony, I know not. And I never will.
Lately, I’ve been feeling stuck. Not the typical sentiment of hopelessness, but the feeling of being stuck with people who feel so much, yet do so little. I feel deserted in this swarming culture. If only I could unfeel. If only…
